Hedgenotes
a blog on life and all the things from my side of the hedge.
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As a sensitive and fair-skinned redhead you'd think sunscreen was my bff. In reality, its not something my generation (I'm a Xennial) grew up using. As late as 1999, there was still controversy “regarding the role of sunlight in the development of skin cancer”. SPF 30 didn’t hit the markets till the early 90’s and wasn’t the standard minimum recommendation in Canada until 2016 (my kids were 5 and 1). “Everyone knew” the best way to avoid a sunburn was to get a good base tan first. "Everyone knew" having a golden summer glow was healthy and good. Sunscreen was really only used if you were going to the beach, and even then you’d see just as many people with SPF 4 tanning oil and aluminum reflectors to catch more rays as you did people applying sunscreen. The only problem with having a sunburn was the pain, or it might make you feel sick if it was bad enough. Sun exposure being linked to cancer risk was simply not a thing we worried about. Thankfully science has advanced, and its widely understood now that regular sunscreen use is important for preventing cancer and premature aging. Mineral sunscreens are more accurately called inorganic sunscreens, because zinc and titanium are not carbon based molecules. Chemical sunscreens are more accurately called organic sunscreens, because the UV filters used are carbon based. Referring to sunscreens as mineral vs chemical plays upon the (false) idea that natural is better and chemicals should be feared but for simplicity of understanding here, I'll largely refer to them as mineral and chemical. I've always stuck to mineral/inorganic sunscreens even though I disliked them, because I believed the myth that they were better for people and planet, and that "chemical"/organic sunscreens weren't safe, but I've since learned otherwise. The "chemical" UV filter bemotrizinol for example (trade name Tinosorb S), has an even better safety track record than zinc oxide does. TikTok started me down a sunscreen rabbit hole that led me to Korean and Japanese (chemical) sunscreens and I now have sunscreens I happily wear every day. I do recognize that being able to purchase Korean or Japanese sunscreens is a privilege. Its better to use any sunscreen than none, and we don't all have access to international products. Our UV filters and rating system in Canada may not be as advanced as other parts of the world but our sunscreens still help protect against skin cancer and premature aging so using whatever products you have access to and can afford is a good thing!!
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12/31/2017 updated June 2024
This story unfolds differently for each person, but all people who have experienced miscarriage have this in common: First you were pregnant. And then you were not. Your womb is empty and so are your arms. Some find relief in the loss while others are devastated. Some face it stoically, while others crumble under the weight of their grief. There is no 'right way' to walk this journey. But there are guideposts along the way to help you as your journey unfolds. This post is written for those first days when a miscarriage is imminent or beginning, but is not yet complete. It uses Susun Weed's 6 Steps of Healing model to help you explore your options to bring the miscarriage to completion. It can be difficult to think clearly in the midst of loss - I hope this tool will be useful to you in a difficult time. <3 As always, remember that I am not a medical practitioner, and the information I provide here is for educational purposes only. It should not be considered as medical advice, a treatment protocol, a prescription, or a recommendation. Any and all information here is to be used at your own discretion, at your own risk, and in consultation with trusted caregivers whenever you deem necessary. ....May you find peace and healing on your journey. <3 5/1/2024 0 Comments Raising Our Wild ChildA number of years ago now, a friend shared on social media that she was struggling with how to peacefully/gently/respectfully parent her wild child. I commented on her post that 'strong-willed children become adults who change the world… as long as we can hang on for the ride and resist the temptation to 'tame' the spirit out of them.' I didn’t say it because we had that nailed in our home, and its by no means a concept unique to me. I offered it to encourage her to keep going on her path of gentle parenting and bring her a little hope that the hard days were worth the struggle. A year later it came up in her memories and she asked if I could make it a meme for her to share with others. It has since taken on a life of its own with over 10 million shares.
9/13/2023 0 Comments Do we need to push our kids?There's a post circulating at the moment about how if we push neurodivergent kids when they're too close to the edge we'll push them over (bad), so we need to wait until they're regulated and ready, then push them just the right amount to challenge themselves (good).
And on first glance I almost shared it, because pushing kids over the edge is obviously a bad thing therefore pushing them just the right amount to 'push themselves' must be a good thing. But something felt off so I sat with it. Okay, so before I get into it, let me clarify two things. lol
Firstly, I'm a parent who believes wholeheartedly in full spectrum radical Unschooling as a way of life for *my* family. I think of unschooling as traditional homeschooling's wild and wise rebellious cousin who is part of the family but not always understood or welcomed at the table because our existence tends to make people uncomfortable. Unschooling does NOT mean leaving your child to do whatever they want whenever they want. Unschooling is a non-coercive child-led approach to learning where the parent creates a supportive and opportunity-rich environment in which to lovingly and respectfully co-exist with their child. Unschooling can even include formal curriculum and classes if that is what the child is genuinely looking for and they are both free to pursue that curriculum at their own pace AND free to quit, at their own discretion. Unschooling at its most basic is child-led, self-directed learning. In its fullest expression it is a radical full spectrum whole life approach to existence and growth which fully respects a child's personhood. Unschooling is built on an understanding of, and respect for, the innate curiosity and drive to learn *all* humans are born with. The school system methodically diminishes this drive, creating a society of adults who unquestioningly defer to so-called authorities and experts; who believe they have to do everything on their own (be independent) losing out on the beauty and strength of community and radical connection; and to parents who view themselves as incapable of supporting their children's growth and learning on their own, thus perpetuating the colonizing, capitalist, and ableist cycles of harm and control. Secondly, and just as importantly our culture has made parents depend on the school system, and even parents who know in their heart its not good for their kids aren't always able to make other choices. School is an extremely powerful system and the overwhelming majority of parents have their kids participate in it because colonization, capitalism, and all its cronies have slowly eroded parents' options to do otherwise even when they want to. I recognize our entire culture revolves around school and so the things I'm gonna say are not an indictment of individual parents or teachers who are doing the best they can with what they have and for the circumstances they're in, whether that be in the school system or with home-based learning. All that being said - Let's go! 1/18/2021 0 Comments Embracing the Crone/HagThe first New Moon of 2021 was last week and while I had hoped for glowy vibey creative meditation time, instead I spent days knee deep in dealing with a bad review someone (not a customer, client, or member of my community) left on my facebook business page, as they wanted to 'teach me a lesson' and 'cost me customers' by leaving the bad review..... all because I spoke up in support of another local woman-owned business he publicly body-shamed and defamed. This person in fact creeped the profiles of many of the woman who stood up to him and left bad reviews where he could (like with me), or in another case, went so far as to find out their employer and called to tell them to fire her for "bullying him" (she shared a definition of a word, and an explanation of a common phrase). Fortunately the employer was already aware of the situation. I responded to his review on my page, but he refuses to let the comment stand and continually deletes it, as well as comments from anyone who stands up to him or defends me. Unfortunately that's just the way facebook is set up, even though he is now banned from my business page.
I recently had a conversation with someone who was shocked - dare I even say, appalled - to learn I can’t recite the order of the planets, or reliably name the capital of each province. No part of my daily life depends on immediate recall of these factoids, so I am 100% comfortable not having them at the top of my brainspace. I can read. I have access to books, the public library, and the internet. I know how to search for high quality information as needed and do so often. If I need to know about planets or capital cities, I’ll go online or to the library and seek out current relevant information instead of relying on the recollection of dusty facts I learned 3 decades ago :) Lol.
3/28/2019 0 Comments Motherhood: Rising From The AshesBecoming a mother... it can be beautiful and magical and fulfilling and lovely and life changing in all the best ways. We have been surrounded for centuries by carefully curated images that show us this perspective of motherhood. What many of us don’t see, is that birth is also an ending; a forging in the fire; a death and a rebirth.
As a passionate and vocal advocate for respectful connected parenting, and as the neurodivergent mother of a PDA Autistic tween and a pre-diagnosed ADHD child.... one of the questions I often hear is "What about when a child "needs consequences? What about when they NEED to be punished? What do you do then? Because sometimes 'a talk and a hug' isn't enough you know. I want MY kids to grow up to be good people not spoiled brats"
If you ask most who are advocates for consequences or punishment of children what they believe the purpose is, they'll inevitably say something about teaching that actions have consequences and give an adult example like “if you get caught speeding you get a ticket not a cozy heart to heart and a hug” You know what though? Kids aren't stupid, and kids are not adults! 2018 - - it was a big year for our family, and for me. We moved. I turned 40. We celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary. But there was SO much more to 2018 than just those events. 2018 was a year of understanding pieces.
In 2017 I attended my last handful of births as a doula after recognizing that me being away unpredictably no longer worked for our family and that how I practiced as a doula – a birthkeeper really – was not in line with what those who hold the power in our culture expect or allow. I was still committed to being part of the birth world, and thought of myself as a doula on a long-term sabbatical. I was going to continue to learn and grow and contribute, just not IN the birth room until some future time when it worked again for our family. I tossed around the idea of co-creating a prenatal class, of building a substantial blog, of writing a book, of creating online courses.... |
Sarah StogrynHerbalist. Hedgewitch. Archives
July 2024
CategoriesAll ADHD ASD Homeschooling Miscarriage Mothering Neurodivergent Parenting Pregnancy Radical Whole Life Unschooling Skincare Sunscreen |
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